Read through my journal last night and i found this written,
"I’ll keep walking.
I’ll keep praying
I’ll stay alive.”
Haha. Bet i wrote this after reading The Hunger Games trilogy.
I have those nightmares which cause me to sleep talk. Well, I never experienced screaming, but I know one thing, when I utter words while sleep talking, I sound so afraid and horrified. And I am grateful I have been blessed with a mother who awakens when I’m having those freakin’ episodes.
I’ll hear her say, “Apple, it’s just a bad dream. Do not fear.”
And that has a calming effect on me. the fear…
"Paglaki ko, gusto kong magtrabaho sa airport." (When i grow up, I want to work in an airport.)
"Ah, eh di gusto mong maging piloto?" (Ah, so you want to be a pilot then?)
"Hindi. Ako ang gagawa ng mga eroplano." (No. I will be the one who builds the airplanes.)
galaxies inside your head.
Stop letting people
you cannot shine.
Today, I resolve to unlock the door of this protective cage where I have imprisoned you for quite a long time. However, I discovered that it wasn’t really you who was the prisoner, it was myself. So, I am actually not setting you free, it is myself that I am setting free.
I discovered why I wanted to linger before. It’s because I had this Rocky Balboa syndrome.
“All I wanted to do was prove I was…
I cannot say that today has been unproductive. Hmm, maybe it was, but in a very, very good way. Sacred calm. Maybe that’s what you call it. Scarred I may be but I am traveling, travailing even, in a road that leads to freedom, unending peace, abounding joy. And every step along the way is a gift to be celebrated–every chuckle, every tear, every chirping of the bird, every barking of the dog,…
There’s an old story that describes Heaven and Hell.
In Hell, there are long ornate tables topped with giant plates of freshly cooked food, as much as you can eat, with giant golden forks and spoons. The people attempt to eat with those huge utensils but they can’t ever get the food in their mouths.
In Heaven, there are the same tables, the same food, the same golden utensils. And the people are eating with celebration and joy: because they’re feeding each other.
I think we see glimpses of this everyday, right now, because Hell is isolation and Heaven is meant to be shared. And I think they’re not too far apart, because God did make all things for good, but it’s our decision to use them for good or for evil. It is the orientation of our heart towards God and His grace that bring us closer together: for the closer we are to an infinitely loving God, the less selfish we become.
I hope we will choose to get in that fun messy festive life of feeding each other.